Sunday, June 3, 2007

Free Lou!

The cheap seats would be in Wrigley Field, but I'm too afraid of getting hit by a flying travel mug. Now, let me preface this entry by making sure everyone knows that I don't like the Cubs. Their fans are spoiled, snobby fools who make Alabama NASCAR fans look like a golf gallery. They still give grief about that Sox fan who leapt out of the stands and attacked an umpire, then they turn around and chuck hard plastic travel mugs onto the field, endangering not only the umps, but their OWN PLAYERS AND COACHES. The team itself is a mess of errors and diva-like behavior that even Alex Rodriguez would struggle to match. Their star pitcher sent their top catcher to the hospital after said pitcher threw a ball that makes knuckleballers say "what the hell?" They spend ridiculous amounts of money to bring in star players that underachieve every season, and the media and fans blame it on some curse or another. Plain and simple, the Cubs are terrible.

However, I am about to defend their manager, Lou Piniella. "Why," you might ask? Because the one entity in baseball that is more inept than the Cubs has wrongfully placed Lou on an indefinite suspension for nothing more than kicking dirt on an umpire. If you took the league office's word on the situation, you would think Lou took a baseball bat out of the dugout and hit each ump over the head with it before doing the same to Atlanta Braves manager Bobby Cox. The official language says that Piniella "made contact with umpire Mark Wegner."

Are you kidding me? I've seen the replay a hundred times in the past 24 hours, and Wegner's pant leg doesn't even ruffle at the point where all the officials are saying that Piniella kicked Wegner. In fact, the only direct contact made between an umpire and Piniella (apart from his substantial midsection bumping the umpire's) came when crew chief Bruce Froeomming starts trying to push Piniella away.

Let's get one thing straight. Piniella has had enough tirades directed towards umpires that he knows what's really out of bounds in this situation. He'll kick dirt, he'll throw hats, buckets of baseballs, bases, and anything else he can get his hands on, but you will never, EVER see Lou Piniella make physical contact with the ump. In fact, you will almost never see ANY manager make physical contact with an ump because, despite the rage that they are flying into, they know the rules. Even though some players may not get it (cough...Josh Bard), managers and coaches know the score.

What we're seeing here is a bunch of umpires defending one of their own by trying to knock down the guy who torments them the most (visibly, at least). Because one or two guys think they saw Piniella kick Wegner, the whole fraternity of umps has manipulated the pictures in their head to give them the outcome they want. Sure, they won't say it outwardly, but you know that every umpire who is assigned a Cubs game says to himself, "Crap, i have to deal with Piniella." They don't like him and he doesn't like them. But since they're the ones being backed by the league office, Lou is the one who gets screwed in this situation.

My version of the penalties that should've been given out over the past two days: Carlos Zambrano suspended by the Cubs for one start and Michael Barrett given no penalty, Lou Piniella given a small fine and a one-day suspension for the dirt-kicking, and the entire Cubs organization fined $500,000 for their drunken, moronic fans causing a dangerous situation on the field. The league office needs to get their act together and start making their penalties sensible and fair.

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